science fiction

Sword of the Barbarians Movie Review

Starring: Pietro Torrisi, Yvonne Fraschetti, Mario Novelli, Xiomara Rodriguez, Magareta Rance, Lou Kamante, Sabrina Siani, Al Yamanouchi
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Review Summaries
"Italian-made sword-and-sorcery adventure about a bare- chested barbarian seeking revenge for the killing of his tribe by an evil warlord backed up by an evil demi-goddess. Our hero is joined by a woman and an Asian archer, fights through various perils, and is granted a magical crossbow(?) to slay the witch. Lousy makeup effects, laughable plot devices, naked women, tire tracks on the road, this film is bad on so many levels, you can't help but laugh and stare in shock and disbelief. At least the sword fights are a half-step away from being worthless. "
Zorikh Lequidre, Resident Scholar


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Overall Review
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Plot
**Fantasy or Science Fiction?** - fantasy story on another world/distant past
Explore/1st contact Yes
Technology/$$$$/Info hunt Yes
Stealing/recovering/destroying - magical weapon
Mental/Magical powers focus Yes
War and Invasion Yes
Major kinds of combat: - sword fights - magical battles

Main Character
Identity: - Male
Profession/status: - Prince/Nobleman/King
Age: - 20's-30's
Hair color? - blonde
Body type - muscular (man)
Unclothed? - Chest - Chest and Buttocks
Events of movie makes character more... - sad - tougher
Ethnicity/Nationality - White (American) - Italian
How sensitive is this character? - sensitive to others' feelings
Sense of humor? - Mostly serious with occasional humor
Intelligence - Smarter than most other characters
Physique - Very athletic

Secondary Main Character
Identity: - Female
Hair color - brunette (Black)
Hair style - (woman) medium/shoulderlgn, straight
Body type - ample chest & buttocks (female)
Unclothed? - chest - buttocks and chest
How much in movie? - 60% - 80%
Ethnicity/Nationality - Italian

Main Adversary
Identity: - Male
Age: - 40's-50's
Profession/status: - Prince/Nobleman/King - dictator
How much of work is main antagonist actually present in: - 40%
Hair color - brunette (Black)
Hair style - (man) short/standard curly
Body type - fat (man) - muscular (man)
unclothed? - chest
Ethnicity - Italian
Sense of humor? - Mostly serious with occasional humor
Intelligence - Average Intelligence
Physical condition - bulging muscles
How sensitive is this character? - mean, arrogant

Setting
A substantial portion of this movie takes place on a non-Earth planetary body: - humans in a primitive/fantasy society
Planet outside our solar system? Yes
Jungle? Yes
Desert? Yes
Water? Yes

Style
Accounts of torture and death? - very explicit references to deaths and torture
Sex/nudity in movie? Yes
What kind of sex: - kissing - seeing breasts - seeing nude female butt - seeing nude male butt - seeing full frontal--women
Non-American film? Yes
What language? - English
Any profanity? - None
Kinds of F/X - nasty human transformations
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